


Crescendo

by HunterOfTheWild



Series: The composition of life [1]
Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Angst, M/M, Relationship Stuff, a little bit, aomine being the butthead he is, bc that was a huge fuck up, i dunno, influenced by teikou arc
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-04
Updated: 2014-12-07
Packaged: 2018-02-24 02:29:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2564966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HunterOfTheWild/pseuds/HunterOfTheWild
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aomine Daiki lived for the past.</p><p>Kagami Taiga lived for the present.</p><p>Kuroko Tetsuya lived for the future.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Aomine Daiki

Aomine looks down at the phantom player's distraught expression and can't help but laugh bitterly. He knows that this is the only way he has left to pull emotion from his old partner. He laughs and laughs, covering up the tightness in his chest, the painful tug at his heart and the bitterness that threatens to sweep him away. He laughs because he knows that no words will come out and if they do, it will be the words that burst the dam of thoughts and feelings he has built since graduation from Teikou.

 

_Am I nothing to you anymore, Tetsu?_

 

He shifts his eyes downwards and walks away. But he knows that he has one thing left of Tetsu that will never fade. Their past together is something that he has with nobody else and something nobody else has with Tetsu. But it rarely leaves him satisfied.

 

So sometimes, Aomine can't help but remember.

 

He remembers his first meeting with Tetsu. He remembers screaming so loudly that it still makes him laugh when he thinks about it. He remembers those frightening, fierce blue eyes.

 

Aomine knows that those eyes have never changed and it makes him glad.

 

He thinks of the Teikou practices - of Akashi - _Daiki, I know you're free today, walk Tetsuya home_ \- of Murasakibara - _Mah, didn't you buy Kurochin a milkshake? I want one too!_ \- of Midorima - _you do know that yours and Kuroko's horoscopes don't match? Not that I care!_ \- of Kise - _Stop hogging Kurokocchi!_ -

 

And - _blue compliments blue, he knew, but seeing Tetsu so close, so **vulnerable** , made him want to taste that innocence all the more, the silent boy so longer silent_ \- Tetsu.

 

He thinks of all the hours spent at the river, talking about everything and nothing at once.

He thinks of the stolen moments between classes when Satsuki would smile benevolently and quietly make way for him to find Tetsu.

He thinks of the genuine smile that would appear on Tetsu's face when Aomine bumped their fists together – he lived for those smiles, wanted them only for himself, to never show anyone - and Aomine was quite sure he would have done anything for Tetsu.

 

But the less innocent thoughts that had plagued him throughout their friendship are the ones that always still haunt him when he see his shadow – _pale skin dusted with pink, soft lips, nimble fingers tugging at his hair_ \- and he knows that it will never be the same again.

 

''The only one who can beat me is me.''

 

And so, Aomine regrets.

 

Regrets are the one thing that taint his memories of the past. Each time he remembers, they pile up so quickly, so quickly that Aomine feels he is drowning. And he always relents and lets himself drown in the bottomless pit of self loathing he has created. Because if these feelings where the only ones to remain of the past, then Aomine would accept them gladly.

He wraps himself around the memories and refuses to let go.

And he knows that he is being difficult, one look at Satsuki's worried face each time he doesn't appear at practice makes him realize it. He can't tell her that the reason he doesn't want to go to practice is because - _it wasn't Teikou **damn it** , Tetsu wasn't there and there was no sense in exercising because he'd defeat them all anyway and he didn't want to feel that helpless again, that's why Tetsu **left**_ \- he reminisces of times where everything was easier.

Whispers that shout accusations at him are the norm - _that he deserves feeling like this, **you're** the one who walked away_ \- but he laughs anyway, because those whispers sound suspiciously like Satsuki's voice.

But the soft voice that questions Aomine is the one he hates the most.

 

Why did you never look him squarely in the eye and tell him how you felt?

 

Why did you leave him alone?

 

Why did you change so much?

 

_Why did you make me invisible again?_

 

Aomine tugs at his dark blue hair, missing the pale, calloused hands that used to stroke it. He lashes out at the team, targeting Sakurai - _because he knew that Sakurai would always say the one thing he never could, **sorry, so very sorry**_ \- and ignoring Satsuki.

_Why? Why? Why?_

The chorus of words run through his head at increasing crescendo and it shatters his control completely.

 

_I'm so sorry, so very sorry, I was afraid of the way you looked forwards, that when you looked at me you didn't see me anymore but something far beyond, something I couldn't see and that you'd forget me in your haste to get there one day, so I made you remember me the only way I knew how._

He hates it the most, because he is so very sure that it is Tetsu's voice and that he will never be forgiven.

 

Aomine Daiki lives for the past, because it is the one place he believes he can still be happy in.


	2. Kagami Taiga

Kagami realizes that he is not as smart as Kuroko or Tatsuya and he is fine with that.

 

He is not the sort to spend hours upon hours thinking of what should have been done and can still be done. He does know however, that that kind of thinking is sometimes useful and so he sits – _thinking of how to improve, make Kuroko proud_ – and sits on his bed for hours on end, hours that wind up in frustrated groans and endless back pains.

 

He looks down at the arm he is holding, the smaller male not being able to stand on his own. - _Idiot, you can't stand, do you want me to carry you?_ \- He snorts with a slight twitch. But he feels the confused tension flowing from the opponent's ace, Aomine Daiki, and subtly shifts the phantom player behind him.

He knows he may not be smart, but alas, he has always relied on instinct.

 

And so, Kagami flourishes.

 

He returns from America, eyes full excitement for – _the sound of shoes squeaking against the panels, the sound of that beloved orange ball thudding across the court_ – what lies before him, not behind him – _Tatsuya, hurt ankle, how do you expect me to play seriously_ – and is disappointed by the lower level of basketball at first.

But he plays, always with his whole heart, a shining beacon for all those watch him. An incredibly fierce young man who seems ready to conquer the world.

 

Kagami considers his first meeting with Kuroko. He heard about the so called 'Generation of Miracles' and it made him curious – _like a tiger, ready to pounce_ – only to come up short. He scoffs and snorts, says what he think is best for the other – _no talent, you'll get ripped apart in court, careful of the tiger's claws_ – and pushes him from his thoughts. He knows that he does not have time or consideration for those not in his direct surrounding and it doesn't bother him.

 

But the sudden showing of the phantom player's abilities turns Kagami's head right around. He is not used to his steadfast opinion being overridden by anyone – _especially not a short guy, what about those tiger's claws_ – and feels his thoughts focus on Kuroko. He realizes that they are in one class, he realizes just how much shorter the other is – _it's not like it wasn't obvious, maybe Kagami just liked putting his elbow on the others head_ – and realizes that he doesn't mind.

 

He has to sit out whenever his legs are damaged and curses up a storm when he thinks the coach can't hear him. But his thoughts are disrupted the instance he spots Kuroko on the court. He plays so gracefully – _slim, long limbs, what would those feel like beneath him_ – that it makes him jealous for a moment.

 

If Kagami was a tropical thunderstorm, Kuroko was an icy blizzard.

 

And he is okay with that, because now he knows he can learn from and teach the other, but the thought of Kuroko dunking and playing on his own leaves him breathless – _would he still be needed? Could he still be by his side?_ \- and it darkens his expression. He watches Izuki coordinate passes, Hyuuga shoot three pointers, Mitobe score hook shots. He watches them all, but only has eyes for one. Blue eyes – _so terribly, terribly blue, it hurts to look too long, seeing beyond him_ – gently crinkle into a smile and Kagami knows he is lost.

 

When he meets the rest of the Generation of Miracles, Kagami knows he will never forgive them – _distrust, betrayal, the tiger's claws are a-waiting_ – for having crushed his partner so carelessly.

 

He knows that his own light has to shine so much brighter. He is confused by the sudden thoughts of how he will play – _not the usual, not enough, push, **JUMP**_ – to become better for somebody else, not just await the next best challenge.

 

 

He knows that all, yet – _why can't he jump, why why why_ – why does he find so much easier to just live and not plan? Why can't he be more serious about the future?

 

 

He knows that he is not good enough for Kuroko as he is.

 

 

And thus, Kagami falls.

 

He falls the moment he tells Kuroko to stop playing basketball, the moment he ignores – _the blatant hurt, the fierce determination_ – the other player, the moment he thinks himself better.

 

 

He falls when he expressively tells Kuroko that they should – _keep from distance each other, don't pass to me, I'll play on my own_ – work on their separate strengths first, when Hyuuga has to tell Kuroko that – _no, Kagami is an idiot, he just wants to be a better light to you_ – and he falls when he realizes that Kuroko still is the one helping him.

 

_**Damn this all to hell.** _

 

He gives in. He doesn't stop to think anymore, he just acts – _even if dealing with the consequences is hard, it's better than having nothing left to fight for_ – and it brings him so much more joy than what he felt when had torn himself from thinking of the present.

 

And so when Kuroko shows up at his door, Kagami does not hesitate. He pulls the other inside, neither saying anything – _he knows blue and red clash, but it leaves a delicious contrast, the colors of passion and calm_ – but saying everything at once. He feels like he should be drowning, but calloused hands grip his face, bring it closer – _soft, pliable, do I taste vanilla?_ \- The taste gives him a delirious high and the urge to – _consume, possess, own_ – taste more. It takes him to dizzying heights and he feels his blood pumping ever faster, a crescendo of sensations and emotions.

 

When he wakes up next to a warm body the next morning, he realizes that maybe relying on someone else isn't such a bad idea.

 

Kagami Taiga lives for the present, because nothing else makes him feel more alive.


	3. Kuroko Tetsuya

Kuroko looks up at the looming figure of Aomine Daiki and can't help but feel crushed underneath a weight that is not all too unfamiliar. He feels the guilt, self-loathing and sadness move underneath his skin, following his veins, flowing in them - _looking for a way out, escape, absolution -_ and staggers into another figure whose presence surrounds him and lifts a little of the pressure from his shoulders. He feels Kagami looking down at him, but he can't look away from dark - _so dark, he was drowning, help -_ eyes of his - _friend, partner, **light**_ \- opposition and can feel his nails bite into skin, drops of blood forming.

He looks away, stubbornness setting in and resolution forming.

 

 

Kuroko doesn't have many friends, doesn't have anyone who actually _sees_ him and he is used to it - _thick skin, transparent, ghostly_ \- and only some days would feel like he was knocking on a door that no one else could see. Then one day a person knocked back and opened that door, even if it was only centimeters and his world seemed so much more aware of him from there and Ogiwara passed him a ball and said - _meet me there, the place where we belong -_ and all seemed good when he had that ball in his hand. He is terrible at it, Kuroko realizes not too soon, but the sore muscles and ringing laughter makes him - _he wasn't a window, he existed_ \- feel alive.

He starts middle school soon after that, more comfortable in his skin - _still pale, but not transparent, strong_ \- than he had been in a long time. Ogiwara promises to meet him often enough and that is enough for the boy who has never had anyone. That ball still fit so well into his hand and he joined the club as soon as possible.

But he tries hard - _so hard, he could feel the blood and and tears and it **hurt** \- _ and it still isn't enough. He can feel the cracks forming on his skin - _small, so incredibly thin, but there_ \- and ignores them the best he can and tries harder. He sets his eyes - _so blue, as blue as the never ending sky_ \- against the horizon, to see what lays ahead.

 

That's when he meets Aomine Daiki.

 

Of course he had seen the boy before, just never expected the - _raging tornado, furious wind_ \- ace player to take an interest in him. Kuroko doesn't know what attracts the boy to him, but he was thankful, thankful for a friendship that brought him to the forefront, brought him before the emperor's eyes, brought him even a little bit more into the sun. Aomine is the glue fixing the little hairline cracks in his pale transparent armor. Kuroko looks at his hands, imagining pale shimmering marks where he had started to lose pieces of himself. And then he knows that when he looks up, he would see the boy with the sun in eyes and the wind in his hair and the world in his smile. And he knows that he would be happy as long as he has that boy beside him. He looks forward, confident with the presence beside him.

 

They become older rapidly though and it shows in their games, their relationship, their friendship. Kuroko knows that when Aomine looks at him with that small languid smirk - _god he wanted those lips against his, feel those hands against his scarred skin -_ and teasingly runs a hand through his hair - _dangerous, predator, run -_ that he would freeze with even one touch. His icy skins seems clammy to him and the dark skin against him freezes him to the core, wanting to remain in that moment of eternity.

He feels his skin crumbling, he feels his wall breaking away.

 

He feels himself become fragile.

 

It shouldn't have surprised him then, when one action, one sentence, one person takes it all away.

 

_I can't remember what it feels like to receive your passes anymore._ The look of despair in his eyes as he said it.

 

_They were letting us score...?_ The look of despair in his eyes as he said it.

 

Kuroko feels his skin crack.

 

 

He sits at home, counting them, seeing them fill up with tears. He sees what lies beneath and tries to catch whatever dreams and hopes fall out. He desperately tries to fix himself and fails, he remains broken.

After that, Kuroko disappears.

 

He doesn't come to class, doesn't play basketball _._ The ball that once fit into his hand so naturally, doesn't fit anymore. _I don't want it._

 

A shadow enters Seirin High and in the spur of the moment, signs up for the same club that had shattered him before. As much as he wanted to, he couldn't stay away and wasn't sure if he wanted to - _he remembers what they were before victory became everything, the feeling of the ball thudding against his hand -_ and sees _\- a tiger, a thunderstorm -_ a man heading towards him. He passes by with not even a look towards the shadow and he doesn't know if he is happy about it or not.

 

The shadow soon meets wildness personified and can finally set his middle school behind him. And so the shadow becomes Kuroko Tetsuya once again.

 

Everything is so different from Teikou, Kuroko could laugh and cry at the same time.

 

_This is what it is supposed to be like?_

_This is what a game should look like?_

_I can be myself?_

 

Blue eyes - _crying, made of steel, determined -_ set themselves forward once again. So what if he is broken, so what if his skin crumbles at the smallest touch, so what if he is made of glass? Kuroko puts himself together piece by piece, hard work and patience filling the gaps. He looks down at his skin and clearly sees all his faults laid down before him and he smiles.

He smiles because he knows what happened in the past has made him what he is now, influenced what he will be. He smiles because he knows his skin is made of memories and because he has remade himself.

 

The moment he sees Aomine Daiki reflected in Kagami Taiga's eyes, his world shudders for a moment. Kuroko sees red eyes following him intently - _sees the passion, sees the fire_ \- and stumbles.

 

He stumbles every time he notices Kagami tracking his movements.

He stumbles every time he catches himself leaning in towards Kagami.

 

He stumbles for the last time when Kagami takes him in one night and falls into a dance - _skin on skin, blue and red clash so beautifully -_ of passion and intimacy and everything feels right again when Kagami tracks those silvery trails crawling over his skin like creeping vines. Kuroko marvels at the wild tiger lying next to him, marvels at how red hair glides through his fingers. He marvels and feels, but a flash of dark blue eyes -  _blue compliments blue, cold hands tangled in his hair -_ makes him tighten his eyes and his heart for a moment. His mind and heart clash, forming a crescendo of feelings that rushes through his head, hearing the pounding of a heart too sore to properly let go but too hopeful to not.

 

The next morning, Kagami looks to the pale blizzard made human and finds him gazing through the window, at the far off distance, wishing for something that was and can never be again. Kuroko takes one last deep breath and looks down unto the tame tiger and smiles.

 

Kuroko knows when to leave the past behind, treasure the present and remake the future. He knows it's the one place everything can still change.

 

 

And it's definitely not a shadow that leaves Seirin High.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Yoooo, this will be a three shot. Teikou arc fucked me up bad, so this is how I dealt with it. Cheers, have a good one.


End file.
